If I count them I must have had quite a number of crash-hats over the years. I can well recollect the very first. A neighbour, one Peter Pownall, had a 1968 CB250 Honda. Brand new it was. Oh, but it looked extremely exotic back in the day. He let me try on his lid on when I was about 15 years old. It had leather flaps and resembled a sort of 1960's Mike Hailwood jobbie. I wore it just before he took me for my first pillion ride.

It was a little time later that I actually bought my very own lid, not too long after I acquired my 1965 D7 Bantam (not very exciting I'm afraid), all metallic green it was, the helmet that is; the bike was a sort of rusty red hue. A Stadium crash helmet was my initial toe in the water. This was way back in 1970 after I passed my test. In truth you didn't actually 'have' to wear a crash helmet if you didn't want to back then. Yes, I know; wooden wheels, sparking clogs, etc. On my first occasion I did just ride bare-back, as it were. My Dad insisted I got a helmet. Nothing too expensive or fancy you understand, but the Stadium was the sort of norm, the 'grey porridge' of lids. At that time it didn't come with a visor or goggles or any kind of ocular protection but I wore glasses so what the heck, eh?

I know that it's hard to believe these days but equally I didn't have any gloves or a purpose made jacket either and… BOOTS?

Just don't be ridiculous!

The Stadium though, was an awkward fit, a sort of one-size-fits-all type of thing and it sat strangely high on one's bonce. Being a martyr to fashion, a dedicated follower no less, this concerned me greatly. Clearly anybody whose general dress sense was either an Afghan or an Army Great-coat together with a pair of 26-inch velvet (crushed) loons just couldn't be seen with such a ridiculous hat!

The reason that it sat so high was to protect your head of course, utilising a sort of white cotton webbing gathered together with a piece of twine (very sophisticated) but, I mean, it just looked so… non-U!

In order to remedy this I filed the Stadium away with my Paisley Shirt and elephant cord trousers and I bought a cheap Everoak off a mate. The hat had been down the road a few times, but although it seems unusual these days to actually part with folding for this type of clearly-damaged safety apparel, it really wasn't that strange back then. The helmet in question is here before you in all its glory. It's the hand-painted one in the selection shown. Would you believe it, this one sat high as well?

No, neither could I and so in a fit of spleen I cut out the strapping with kitchen scissors and successfully managed to achieve, in just two minutes, the desired and subtly stylish look.

I was also a keen model maker at that time and fancied myself as some kind of artist, so I set about embellishing the original design as is made clear in the portmanteau before you. The more observant will notice Popeye, Tom and Jerry, The Red Baron, even. I have retained the helmet as a warning, a reminder if you like of the wayward adolescent mind…

After this, I got into full face lids (I think Bell were indeed the very first). They were all the rage. I, just be obtuse, had a Premier, as promoted by Phil Read no less (cost one month's wage). A Centurion followed, then a new Japanese helmet… Arai? They'll never catch on…

In truth, I never really took to full-face helmets. I always felt claustrophobic in there, like I was watching the road as if on a TV screen rather than a live performance. Sometime after following yet another company re-launch I bought an Everoak GP (also as shown) and did a rather better job of repainting this one. After many miles on the T140 (it was quite noisy, the bike and the helmet) I moved on and subsequently acquired newer Hinckley Triumphs and then conjured up the Nolan open-face, covering around 25 thousand miles with that one. This was/is a fine helmet but is definitely constructed to a price (cheap) and has started to fail somewhat.

Classic Hats on Right Now......

This all brings me to 'fancy pants, the latest arrival, bought recently, the new kid on the block. This is a Schuberth J1 and we are back to those premier prices. You can pay anything between £310 and £425 for one of these. Not altogether surprisingly I preferred the lower end of the price scale but it is a bit special… this one is in desirable Matt Black, together with the now nearly-compulsory seatbelt type strap, fully removable lining, a protective chin guard no less and (wait for it - this is the best bit) a drop down internal black eye shield! Tres chic n'est pas?

Oh, I admit it the bells and mirrors won me over, but in a practical sense it is also very, very quiet for an open-face. The visor seems to be about 1cm thick and has a really effective ratchet, which prevents the screen from flying up if you look over your shoulder at speed, a trick that the Nolan could perform with ease!

It is equipped with internal whooshy ventilation airways and is extremely light…I won't be painting this one. Recommended.

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